The Greatest Gift

We recently enjoyed a special day celebrating family birthdays. We have quite a bit of family living in the Phoenix area so we gather periodically to celebrate birthdays together.

My parents began a profound tradition years ago, way back when I was a young girl. When we celebrate a birthday within the family we give the birthday person a tangible gift, but we also give them what's knows as a "verbal gift".

Every person takes a turn to gift the birthday person verbally by sharing with them something they admire about that person: a character trait, an area of growth, an accomplishment, something that has stood out to them over the past year.

Throughout the years this tradition has become the highlight of all of our family birthdays. For a moment we get to hear just how wonderful, how loved, how supported we are by the rest of our family members.

Everyone likes to hear how great they are, but this is not the only reason verbal gifts are such a huge hit. By hearing how we are loved by our family in very specific ways year after year after year, it affects our self esteem, our outlook on life, our confidence, our maturity, and our overall development in massive proportions. Think about it, we grow up knowing exactly why our sister, our brother, our mom and our dad love us. They each share with us particular incidences where we have positively affected them, even if we had no idea at the time that our actions were contemplated, or even noticed.

Being on the receiving end of accumulating affirmations and reinforcements that are genuine help to build a strong character. I am grateful to have grown up with this tradition. I know it has contributed to my overall well being as a person. I am even more grateful to be able to pass this valuable tradition on to my own children.


At their young ages, they have already received as well as given verbal gifts of their own. They are learning to contemplate and express traits in others they admire. They are also learning to graciously accept and relish in nice things others have to say about them.

What are some family traditions you follow that instill values in your kids?

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